This thing happen at my work yesterday.
We had a meeting, a retrospection. Now, we have our meetings on skype. So, like we all were virtually present. And everybody had to say how were their last 2 weeks of work. If they have any inputs or feedback about the work process. I really didn’t have anything to say. So when it was my turn i said so just as i had decided.
But when it was our team lead’s turn, as always, he had a lot of things to say. And after he is done he always asks everyone about their opinions on it. Yesterday again he asked everyone about their opinions and well it was like, nobody replied. Including me. We could have said “yea we agree” or we could have said “oh no that is not a good idea in my opinion” or we could have just said “i don’t think we have any opinion about it” rather than just staying mumm and keep him wondering what we all are doing. I am glad that he just laughed out at this. He could have got angry and walked out of the meeting or said some harsh words but he didn’t.
But after the meeting i really felt miserable. I am still feeling. I knew nobody else was going to say anything. But since i am trying to be a better person, trying to improve myself I should have said something. I failed myself.
In my protest I can say that whatever he was saying, on that our opinion wasn’t going to matter. He shouldn’t have discussed it with us. He should have just told us rather than asking our opinions. But again, if i want to move up a level, i need to prove it by showing that i too have a brain that thinks and makes points and gives opinions. I lost that chance. And i was busy doing some coding while he was doing the talking. I was a bit stressed with my work. This is more of an excuse though.
So I am once again going to remind myself about the things that I want to achieve, the things that i need to change about my self.
Wherever you are, be all there-
I am only going to do one thing at a time. I need to learn to connect and disconnect myself and my brain immediately. I am little slow in such things, but i need to change. Even if i fail in the beginning, i need to take this task. I have to do it.
Be loud and clear
Sometimes i don’t say things out of shyness and fear. I also sound meak when someone says thank you and I have to say welcome or no problem in return. That shouldn’t happen right? Well it happens because i am overwhelmed that someone says thank you to me(so many times). But it is so disrespectful to not to say ‘welcome’ loud and clear when they say ‘thank you’ clear enough to make us their feelings known!!
So i know where i go wrong and how i can correct myself. Now i just have to put efforts into it. I don’t want to be the same me when I go back to India. I want to be a better person. Person who loves herself. Person who makes everyone around her feel good. I want to be a Bawse!